I miss you Carbs.

So I am making an effort to eat less carbs because its basically all my diet consisted of and I thought some more protien and fat would be healthy. So no big deal right just stop eating so much bread and chips and ohhh everything thats delishious in the whole wide world. Day one i thought okay I can do this its okay well thats because i def ate chipolte. Day two I yelled at a lot of my assoicates, then I come home only to want to (eat carbs) watch tv but oh great the storm knocked out our tv and internet. kill me now. day 3- my assoicates think its funny to mention all the carb related food they will soon be consuming. I do not. On a more positive note I have eaten things that I havent eaten in years last night I had a hamburger! No bun but I ate the meat and cheese. Yes I know cheese has carbs back the hell off im not totally off carbs. (carb rage)

What else oh yeah I move Aug 5th. Which my boss gave me the 5th and 6th off bc she knew I was moving which was really nice of her bc I forgot to ask for those days off, but heres the great part-my dad is out of town and my mom has a bulging disc in her neck so I have nobody to help me move lol. I can move candles and posters, but ill have no bed or dresser basically. This is all esp helpful bc my dad insisted on us moving to the second floor of the complex so now I really cant move myself. Thanks mom and dad!

I really suck at updating this thing. Prehaps thats bc I talk to megan nearly every night and tell her everything anyway and nobody else cares about my pointless random life. I will write more after my workout with morgan. She is forcing me to go to a trainer with her. Kill me now.

Piano Bars and McDolands.

So my dream finally came true last night.... I got to go to the piano bar in KC, and yes it was everything I hoped for and more. Let me set the scene: when anyone walks in they shine a spotlight on them and the whole bar yells "holy shit, look who is here!" they also have a wheel that people can pay to spin and things on it like sing a solo, ice bath, etc. I think my favorite part of the night was when I discovered that the fish bowls were only $13. Last night was American Idol night, meaning you could pay to have your friend get up and sing a song of your choice. I dont really remember too much more... just meeting some guys with mohawks, me getting so drunk I started to get super cold and couldnt stop shaking, and making morgan go through 3 taco bells before we realized it was past all of taco bells closing time so then we went to mcdolands which was prob the best food I have ever eaten in my life.

I'm kinda boring

well my life has been pretty damn boring as of lately. I have been trying to not have to many emotional breakdowns with school projets all hitting at the same time and then working like 9000 hours a week. Being a CSL at such a high volume store is equal to being a CO manager at another VS so its a lot of work but I like it. Sometimes I just get overwhemled. For some reason I had what seemed to be an easy semester until thes last few weeks and then I was was hit wtih like the hardest projects ever. I admit I wasnt doing too hot thoughout the rest of the semester with other life stuff so whatever its not the end of the world to have bad grades I keep telling myself... I just feel like sometimes everyone has moved on but me.. My mom reminded me though that I DID just get this promotion at work and thats moving forward. I am almost done with school-1 year left. Its not a race I keep telling myself. Yes I would have liked to do 4/12 years or 5 like my other friends but I had some circumstatces that held me back that I dont like to admit and I wish like hell I was stronger and could have kept going but what is, is and I cant keep beating myself up over it. For some reason Im just in a down place and I am trying like hell to get out of it. My goal though is to never ever let it show at work and I think that so far I have done a great job at that.I ROCK my segments. I always have the highest converison (which i wont bore you with but thats like really amazing and good) anyway.... I wish I had fun drunk stories for everyone but i dont so alas thats my update. I am hoping to be able to go out after the meeting on sunday and celebrate morgans graduation sadly im not off till 9 so im going to hightail it to L town. Lets just rap cap last years events....
someone we wont say who threw up in a bush at the ranch then kept drinking someone else cough cough (me) might have made a new guy friend for the evening. And ohhh lets see man the rest is all a blur... oh travis I think almost got kicked out of the ranch too lol. Good times!!! Ohhh how a year changes things!!!!

What I couldn't say without tears.....

Megan this is for you because I was too emotional to tell you when I said goodbye and I was too worried I would bawl when I gave my speech so I am writing it so you can read it and save it. I wanted to type up something and give it to you when I left but I figured we might both cry more ;-) here it goes:

I thank God everyday that I decided to go on that cruise and we became best friends. You have been through everything with me these past years and stood by me no matter what. I hope you know that your support throughout my eating disorder and your daily calls and weekly visits while I was inpatient meant more to me than I think I can ever ever express to you. When I don't feel the strength or the will to recover for myself I think of all the support you offered ( and still do) to me during that time and it keeps me going. What I love about our friendship is the fact that we can do anything together and still have fun- wheater its getting lost around KC or getting blackout drunk we make it a good time. I feel like you are part of my family and I am so happy that you have found someone you are going to spend the rest of your life with. (too bad its not in KS though lol) You are truely like a sister to me and I love you so so much. I know everyone says that they arn't sure how they are going to make it without you here but I litterly am questioning it! Who am I going to send my random text messages to now that only you think are funny, or make fun or Barnicles with or drink more than is soically apporatie ever. I don't doubt for a second though that when you come back our friendship will still be the same. I am going to do everything in my power to save up the money to come and visit you at least once while your there. I hope you know just how much I love you. Thank you for making these last years amazing because when we meet I was truely questioning if I was going to be able to get through much more at KU and suddenly it became fun again. Call me like every single day possible and i will do the same. These next years are going to be so great for you as you start a new chapter in your life- it might seem scary now (change is hard) but you have a great guy to stand by you and I am only a phone call or an email away or hell an emerancy plane ticket!
-Melsky

Update of sorts.

Things I need to post about:
my day at disney-
(here are just a few things to tide you over until I get more time)
-a kid smacked me in the face with his ballon as I was walking and I screamed bc it schocked me and instead of his dad saying sorry, he laughed at me. a lot.
- I hit my backbone on spacemoutain so hard that it hurt all day and bruised.

While In CA Haley's driving scared me so much. Worse than me. A bus at one point came cenimeters away from the ide of the car I happend to be sitting on and I apperntly screamed and raised my fist with a wrapper of some sort in it and then I blacked out from fear.

I got really really really drunk at happy hour while wating for haley to get off work so drunk that they stopped asking morgan and I if we wanted more they just nicely brought us our check.

Must blog about last night too bc ... those 4 dollar margatias are really making for some interesitng stories!

The night I dont remember and wish could rewind...

So this post wont be so much about my drunken adventures but what happend to my hmmm how shall I say this... my "guest's" drunken actions last night. I was only going to have a couple drinks and chill and watch TV. Well I made mine pretty strong I guess and Kerry was sleeping on the couch and erin was in and out of the room while we were watching tv so i guess I kept on pouring. Well it was at this point that I deemed it a good idea to send my "guest" some really innaporatie texts (i drank tequilla enough said, and we all know what happens to me when i drink tequilla) so next thing I know he is over at my house and im like woah shit im more drunk than I realized. About this time my megs called and so i was like sorry i am def going to take this call so entertain yourself until im done. Well about this point my blackout begins. I remember bits about our convo but not too much. So then I go into my room where he is and yadda yadda yadda you can guess what happend. The next thing I know its morning and im alone and wearing different clothes and I thought hmmm maybe that was a dream you know... Then I come to find out no no it was NOT...

Later I learn I went into kerrys room with my bra on and shorts layed on the bed and said "well lets hope im infertile" and then kerry's like you cant just leave him in the room by himself and I apperntly said "why we already had sex what more could he want from me"

So he is where it gets good- I walk into the bathroom this morning and im like what the hell is all over the rug? Then Erin texted me and asked me if I got sick last night and I said I blackout but I would def remember being sick bc that like never happens. So we leave and go to Mass street to shop still wondering if it was me that puked or marc or what. Then Kerry comes home, and the mystery is sloved. Apperrntly she herd the door open and someone go to the bathroom and start puking and then started running the shower. Oh yeah that would be the guest! On futher inspection not only was it all over the rugs, it was on kerry's ipod thingy where you set it in and can listen to music, and ALL over the walls. HAHAHA.

He did text me and say he was REALLY sorry for last night and had no idea he was that bad, to which I replied "well I dont even remember last night so dont worry, um ps did we have sex bc yeah i need to be more careful about that if we did."

I really hope only you read this blog meg bc man ppl could really think im a whore if they read this!

OH YEAH PS i bought one of your gifts for your batch. party tonight and tell ppl if they buy you anything from VS run it buy me first bc yeah thats kinda my domain! lol. lets just say nobody gets to buy you anything for the day of the wedding for when you get your hair done. your set with that. :)